What's Your Mental Malfunction

[Z-Row]

i have murderous tendencies. whenever something is wrong, my first thought involves murder, be it some inanimate object, or whoever is bothering me. no matter what the situation is, my first thoughts jump to murder. i cant help it, and its lead me to break a bunch of things, and punch one of my friends in the mouth because he pissed me off. i didnt think, i just acted.

 

[Minkoff]

Too much death metal.

 

[Z-Row]

are you kidding? my playlist right now is johnny cash, bobby darin, neil young, jack johnson, and the white stripes.

how can you do anything but chill the hell out when you listen to jack johnson? especially the banana pancakes song

 

[Rye]

i have murderous tendencies. whenever something is wrong, my first thought involves murder, be it some inanimate object, or whoever is bothering me. no matter what the situation is, my first thoughts jump to murder. i cant help it, and its lead me to break a bunch of things, and punch one of my friends in the mouth because he pissed me off. i didnt think, i just acted.

Whatever the cause, you should go talk to a therapist if you haven't already. That's just not healthy.

 

[Z-Row]

heh, well either way im leaving for the military in a week, and im getting an M4.XD

 

[Incognitus]

I think I'm a pretty effed up individual:

Sometimes - and this is really painful to admit - but I feel unhappy. Usually there is a perfectly rational explanation for it, and I can get over it by thinking positive thoughts... but... yeah... unhappiness.
I mean, I try to do the best I can in life, after all we only get one shot at it, so I want everything to be good and right and perfect, and when I can't do that... it makes me unhappy.
And when I was growing up, with school and everything... my emotions were all over the place! I mean, I could get angry sometimes - or unhappy. And I mean, sometimes I didn't know how to deal with my emotions... so I was unhappy. And as a teenager, growing and discovering my romantic feelings... I wanted sex. If that doesn't make me a nymphomaniac, then what does?
I'm also obviously paranoid because I take care of myself when out or alone, and have OCD because I like to feel clean. Obviously the fact that I don't want to be a slob must mean I'm narcisstic too. God that makes me so unhappy.




~In all seriousness though, I've been diagnosed with bipolar and mild OCD. This was recently, after I went to a psychiatrist to talk through some nightmares I was having that were keeping me up and making me afraid to sleep... They were the byproduct of watching a man get crushed by a train and being run-through with a sword in the space of a few days... Perfectly healthy and innocent.

And I'm sorry for those of you out there with REAL problems, and apologise if my opening paragraphs caused offense.

 

[Krank The Tank]

I get that; I don't think it's paranoia. I mean, if it was incredibly strong, maybe. I've had a couple of times when I've thought I've heard people opening the doors really late at night, and ended up sitting huddled on the sofa instead of actually moving to go to my bedroom - but I think that's just me being a scardycat ^_^

I'm not sure though, because it happens almost every night and...yeah. And when I'm out on the street, if I see someone I question what they might be doing and if it could possibly involve me in any way.

 

[purplecyty]

I'm not sure though, because it happens almost every night and...yeah. And when I'm out on the street, if I see someone I question what they might be doing and if it could possibly involve me in any way.

everyone questions other people they see on the street (in their mind) of course if you show fear they might jump you or rob you. Of course I live in a bad neighborhood so it may just be like that here ^^;; (I hear damn sirens every fucking night and day -.-, and I've been jumped at least every month or 2)

 

[catalyst]

Yeah, same here. Walking around in my current neighborhood, I question every person, every set of headlights... I always get images of something bad happening to me. though, it's bad enough around here that my husband would prefer that I have some sort of weapon with me if I need to go for a walk alone, and I'm scared to take my children for a walk.

Of course, even on the campus I have to know who's walking behind me (not know them, but at least turn and see who it is), and I check all directions down an intersection to see who's there. If I can, I sit with my back to the wall in the classroom. When I can't, I need to see who's behind me in the room, and always look when someone comes in the doors. I have a tendency to need to see all entrances to the room. Though I don't think of it as paranoid. That's just survival instinct. Severe paranoia is when you're away from your friends, and are absolutely sure that they're talking about you behind your back. No one likes you, they all think badly of you, and there's no one you can trust. Check the stuff I had in my post about it. With what you're talking about, that doesn't sound like a disorder, it just sounds like instinct. Human nature.

 

[Vash]

I'm not diagnosed with anything (silly question but where would a person go to fine out) but I'm pretty sure I've experienced:

• Social Anxiety
• Insomnia
• Low Self-Esteem
• Perfectionism
• Low Attention Span
• Fear of Being Alone

I guess I'm not depressed but who knows since I'm not diagnosed.

 

[Euphony]

Social anxiety that's growing into a really nuisance for me. It gets to the point where my legs, hands, and head will shake when facing tense situations or just people that I don't really know well. School presentations are absolute hell for me. Many times when I'm invited to do something even remotely social I find myself just naturally making an excuse to get out of it, and if I get myself into something social I immediately dread it. It's not something officially diagnosed, but I suspect it will come to a point soon. I probably won't be able to function well in college if I don't at least get it checked.

This sort of goes hand-in-hand with low self-esteem. I also do have a serious problem with over-analyzing everything, which leads to some unneeded pessimism and moodiness on and off. Again, not official medical conditions, but that's my screwed-up side, just like everyone has I guess.

There are tons of nice mental dysfunctions floating around in my family, so god only knows what I'll develop. I wouldn't be surprised if minor bipolar disorder or minor depression was too far off.

 

[Z-Row]

i cant speak clearly, and i trip over my words frequently. is that a sign of something neurologically wrong? or is that an acquired habit?

 

[Angelman]

I have a mild diagnosis of Angelman Syndrome (hence the name). I have lots of trouble talking but my non-verbal side works better so i tend to not speak a lot of the time, but instead use sign language or type on the computer (which is obviously working for me). I think that this "handicap" has created somewhat of an interesting life for me, and I have a heightened ability to think non-linearly and write as well. I have had a few seizures in the past.

 

[Bogus]

i am a fruit salad of mental disorders. slight add, autism, and paranoia, fairly severe depression (apparently, though i feel ridiculously happy most of the time and i am very slow to anger or upset), and rather severe OCD. also tourette's, which is probably the most fun of them all. i don't think color-blindness counts but throw that in there somewhere.

Severe depression wouldn't be the right word for it. You may want to look up Bi-Polar disorder or Manic Depression, two things I've been diagnosed with myself. It means you have highs and lows, both in the extremes. One second your hyper-happy, then angry, then suicidal. It's not fun, but it can be helped without the use of meds. I just got married, and apparently I'm fine now. = )

For me, things I've actually been diagnosed and "treated" for (I say that in quotes because nothing they did actually helped.):

Manic Depression
Bi-Polar Disorder
Social Anxiety Disorder (funny that it's acronym is S.A.D...heh)
Schizophrenia (you hear a few voices and see a few moving shadows and suddenly you're crazy)

The doctor also added that I had "Psychotic tendencies" meaning I tended to hurt myself when severely upset, and that he was worried I might be a Sociopath, meaning I show no emotions of my own (basically, it's a bit more complex than that from what I hear though).

I also hit my sister once, but you try talking to your mother and having a nine year old tell you, "You're not aloud to speak because you're psycho and ride the short bus!"...I'd never hit her before that, or after. I'm very slow to anger, and hardly anything makes me angry enough to resort to violence, she was just asking for it all day and that was the last straw. When I was diagnosed with all of those things I was pretty much just numb. I didn't cry, or get angry, or smile...I reacted to things when other people did, not because I felt the need to. If that makes sense.

This is a funny topic, are most of you assuming that you have a disorder based on symptoms you've heard of, or have some of you had a doctor tell you these things?

Euphony, I feel your pain. I can't go into Wal-Mart alone or I'll hyperventilate. I have enough trouble keeping a job, and currently working in the mall has been difficult, but I've learned to keep my head down and focus on my destination. When work begins, however, I just have to explain to some of the kids (I work with stuffed animals) that my shaking hands are just a condition...I'm fine. I don't need them to know that their parents scare me. I seem to do fine with just kids, but when there's a lot of teens or adults around, I start shaking and have trouble breathing. I had many anxiety attacks in school and earned a reputation for being the fasted person to class because I'd sprint through the halls just to avoid looking at anyone. If I noticed how many people were really there, I'd have gone into a fit and had to leave. I missed a lot of school from fear alone.

 

[kayin33]

Bogus, I think the biggest problem with your doctors is that they diagnosed you with "Manic Depression." Are your doctors from the 1950s or something? Manic Depression is a term that hasn't been used for a long time. It's also synonymous with Bipolar Disorder, the term that's used today. Basically, if your doctors told you that you have both Manic Depression and Bipolar Disorder, they have no idea what they're talking about. They're two terms for the same condition, one of which is no longer used.

I'm not gonna tell any of you that you don't have whatever conditions you claim to have because I really don't know anything about the lot of you. However, doctors do misdiagnose a great deal. There are a lot of really crappy psychologists out there.

Also, it's not considered a "disorder" until it greatly debilitates your daily functioning. For instance, you don't have a paranoia disorder if you're just suspicious of other people on the street and are always assuming that the worst will occur. It has to greatly impact you and prevent you from continuing normal functioning. For instance, if you can't walk down the street because you're afraid the cameras will see you and the government will come after you, then you probably have some kind of paranoia disorder. If you're just suspicious of other people being robbers or whatever, then it's probably just an over exaggerated fear, not paranoia per say.

Personally, I was born with OCD. It's genetic, just about everybody on my mom's side of the family has it to an extent. Luckily, my mom being an excellent therapist and whatnot, she saw it in me and started treating me since I was a toddler. Now I don't have OCD. I still have some obsessive tendencies, but I don't follow up on them with the compulsions, and it certainly doesn't affect my daily functioning, so it's not a disorder anymore.

 

[WeissRaben]

Uhm...
I could say...
!) Extremely low self esteem;
2) Not so strong ADD;
3) Extreme and continued research of human touch. Always.
4) Fear of the world...but I regret to say it isn't so unjustified...

 

[Bogus]

Bogus, I think the biggest problem with your doctors is that they diagnosed you with "Manic Depression." Are your doctors from the 1950s or something? Manic Depression is a term that hasn't been used for a long time. It's also synonymous with Bipolar Disorder, the term that's used today. Basically, if your doctors told you that you have both Manic Depression and Bipolar Disorder, they have no idea what they're talking about. They're two terms for the same condition, one of which is no longer used.

That's what I told my doctor. It was my case worker who wrote down Manic Depression, my doctor told my mother it was Bi-Polar and tried to tell her they were different. This was all about 6 years ago, and in relation to the rest of your post at the time it was debilitating. I dropped out of school and couldn't hold a job, I couldn't even leave the house without having a panic attack and my mother ended up leaving me home and running to her father's house in another city just to get away from me. I only took the meds for a few months before realizing all they did was make me angry, all the time. I snapped at everyone for no reason every day for three months straight. I ended up just drinking..a lot, to keep myself calm. It wasn't until I met my husband and got away from my mother that I was all right. Now I'm in college trying to become a psychiatrist so maybe I can do what mine never did.

Anyway, Manic Depression is still listed as a disorder in all the books. Bi-Polar is still a new term to most shrinks, so I listed both in my post. I looked it up for class and found that many doctors still consider it the correct term. I also found that some consider it a lighter, less debilitating form of Bi-Polar. So they're both listed everywhere. Regardless of what you want to call it, there's is no denying that it is a debilitating disorder, if one does indeed have it. Most that are diagnosed suffer from sever depression to the point of suicidal tendencies, as well as random feeling of elation where they might as well be high because it acts the same way in regard to their common sense. Then there's the anger, all of these combined can make living a normal life incredibly difficult. I wouldn't say medication is the answer for this one though, as for most all they really need is stability. I've found that people who suffer from Bi-Polar generally live in a chaotic environment and this 'disorder' is just them acting according to their surroundings. It's only a real problem when the person is removed from the chaos and still acting chaotic.

Thanks for bringing that up though, I knew I shouldn't have listed both of them. I just remember the confusion when I saw both on my sheet when I was in the hospital. I wasn't supposed to see the sheet but I had a nice nurse who actually listed when I asked why I was there. I knew they were the same thing as my father was diagnosed with Manic Depression once upon a time and I'd looked it up and found it's new term. I always wondered why my doctor wrote both down, or why he always mentioned both when speaking to my mother. It seems he wasn't used to the new term yet.

 

[Heartlake]

I seem to have the need to make up events and problems. It's not even for attention, it's just because I can. Sometimes, I think it's just to see if I can get away with it. I think it attributed to my relationship of 2 years breaking up as well.

I have a thing about hygiene too, but just with food. I simply _cannot_ stand someone touching my food, touching the surface my food is being prepared on or touching the top surface of the plate my food is on. If they do, I cut off/scrape away the portion of food affected. You can imagine, this screws me over at restaurants. I'm a complete slob everywhere else though. If I can't be bothered to change, I'll wear the same pair of underwear for upwards of a week and I don't even think I bothering changing jeans for 2 weeks or so.

My dad was a bit of a nutter apparently (never met him, he was in the parachute corps during the Falklands and never bothered coming home, so sayeth the mother) so perhaps it was inherited.

Also, on a side note, the thread title reminds me of something an army drill sergeant would say. Just a personal giggle.

 

[kayin33]

That's what I told my doctor. It was my case worker who wrote down Manic Depression, my doctor told my mother it was Bi-Polar and tried to tell her they were different. This was all about 6 years ago, and in relation to the rest of your post at the time it was debilitating. I dropped out of school and couldn't hold a job, I couldn't even leave the house without having a panic attack and my mother ended up leaving me home and running to her father's house in another city just to get away from me. I only took the meds for a few months before realizing all they did was make me angry, all the time. I snapped at everyone for no reason every day for three months straight. I ended up just drinking..a lot, to keep myself calm. It wasn't until I met my husband and got away from my mother that I was all right. Now I'm in college trying to become a psychiatrist so maybe I can do what mine never did.

Anyway, Manic Depression is still listed as a disorder in all the books. Bi-Polar is still a new term to most shrinks, so I listed both in my post. I looked it up for class and found that many doctors still consider it the correct term. I also found that some consider it a lighter, less debilitating form of Bi-Polar. So they're both listed everywhere. Regardless of what you want to call it, there's is no denying that it is a debilitating disorder, if one does indeed have it. Most that are diagnosed suffer from sever depression to the point of suicidal tendencies, as well as random feeling of elation where they might as well be high because it acts the same way in regard to their common sense. Then there's the anger, all of these combined can make living a normal life incredibly difficult. I wouldn't say medication is the answer for this one though, as for most all they really need is stability. I've found that people who suffer from Bi-Polar generally live in a chaotic environment and this 'disorder' is just them acting according to their surroundings. It's only a real problem when the person is removed from the chaos and still acting chaotic.

Thanks for bringing that up though, I knew I shouldn't have listed both of them. I just remember the confusion when I saw both on my sheet when I was in the hospital. I wasn't supposed to see the sheet but I had a nice nurse who actually listed when I asked why I was there. I knew they were the same thing as my father was diagnosed with Manic Depression once upon a time and I'd looked it up and found it's new term. I always wondered why my doctor wrote both down, or why he always mentioned both when speaking to my mother. It seems he wasn't used to the new term yet.

Yeah, Bipolar disorder is one of the hardest ones to treat and one of the most debilitating, along with some forms of schizophrenia and some others. The medication, Lithium I believe, is supposed to bring you to a "medium" of some sort, so the two extremes are less severe. I'm not sure to what extent it actually does that, but either way the medication in no way solves the disorder. Like most medications, it's just supposed to control the disorder so therapy has a better chance to work. Another problem with the medication is that a lot of people with Bipolar Disorder just stop taking it, because the manic state is like a psychological drug, and the Lithium decreases the severity of that experience.

I'm surprised you want to go into psychiatry after your comments about the medication, though. Wouldn't psychology and therapy be more suited to you? Psychiatrists don't do much nowadays aside from prescribing medication and making big wads of money, therapists do all the good stuff. (There are still psychiatrists who do their own therapy, but they're a dying breed and almost exclusively have private practices.)

Edit: Lithium is old school, it apparently has all sorts of bad side effects. They don't use it anymore, but there are other drugs that do the same thing that they use now.

 

[Buster]

I used to be really OCD when I was a kid (For example, if one of my fingers happened to touch another finger, I'd have to touch all of the other fingers with the same finger an equal amount of times or else it would drive me nuts and I wouldn't be able to think straight), but now I'm only slightly semi-OCD (Mostly with grammar and spelling, actually. Yeah, I'm a Grammar Nazi, whatever).

Other than that, I have a slight case of ADD (I've gone from thinking about the movie 28 Weeks Later to thinking about what a cat would do if it was stuck in a 100 foot tall tree in heavy rain).