good luck bad luck

[Perihelion]

At that very moment, his sister came in, saw the wreckage, and gave him the spanking of his life, which he found strangely exciting. "Harder!" he cried.

 

[Mega Flare]

after yelling out harder his sister got creep out and shot him and was sent to the hospital.

 

[dadevvtsvre]

He had a miraculously quick recovery and all his injuries healed in just two days.

 

[Mega Flare]

after leaving the hospital he got hit by a car crossing the street

 

[Venetia]

but the car was driven by an incredibly hot blonde chick, who tried to give him CPR and rubbed her bosom in his face.

 

[Velocir_X]

His massive hard on was recorded on national news

 

[Cryranos]

However he became a celebrity and got a job in adult media

 

[Glitchfinder]

Only to lose it after testing positive for AIDS.

 

[dadevvtsvre]

But he decided to become an advocate for AIDS research and decided to start a charity to gather money to help those afflicted with the disease.

 

[bacon]

But then he realized that he couldn't get into the ladies' pants anymore. ):

 

[dadevvtsvre]

But it's okay because he suddenly realized that he had the hots for men all along!!!

 

[bacon]

Then he realized that he had AIDS so he couldn't get into the mens' pants. ):

 

[Venetia]

But he heard that alligators have blood that can kill the HIV virus!!!!

 

[friend]

but then he was struck by thunder for thinking such a terrible thought.

 

[Truly else]

Of course, thunder is a sound, so he just has ringing in his ear for a week.

 

[Cryranos]

But now he couldn't hear the train heading straight for him!

 

[-LuX-]

Miraculously the train was switching tracks meters away from crashing into him...

 

[Venetia]

but he'd already shit himself D:

 

[psiclone]

but he happened upon a homeless man who gave him some extra pants and underwear

 

[-LuX-]

which he realized afterwards were infested with lice and fleas