People are getting up in arms of little things in this thread, no one has said gay people shouldn't be able to adopt.
-Gay people should be allowed to adopt.
-Children would be much better off with loving gay parents that whatever other unhealthy environment.
-Having gay parents doesn't mean you will turn out gay.
What family/environment/race/background you come from does not determine where you end up. That's because we are humans not robots. Eventually we reach the maturity to make our own decisions and we are responsible for own choices. Where we end up in life is a result of us. That being said you can't deny parents have a big influence over a child. I'm not suggesting that if a child has an abusive father he will in turn definitely end up as an abusive father. But studies show it is a lot more like. That being said some people won’t make the mistakes their parents made, they aren't their parents. Would you say that he wouldn't be better off in a healthy family environment? Parents are people, people make mistakes, every parent is going to stuff up somewhere. All they can do is try their best.
(as I've read many studies that suggest kids grow up to have more successful love lifes when they have both a male and a female rolemodel in their lives).
I have strong views on this based on my own experience. I don't know any of your personal situations but our views are going to relate to that. If you had a bad childhood I'm sorry and I don't want to offend anyone. Yet that help shaped who you are today, for better or for worse. I'm not saying if you have gay parents or a single parent you will turn out bad. I have a heterosexual mum and dad, I'm a single child, I like in a somewhat middle class family with middle class friends. People might say it's perfect but of course this is definitely not, and never is, the case. My mum is way too overprotective and I think if got mothered too much. Why do I say this? Until recently I had never developed courage, and 'manly' skills, I was really sensitive, I couldn't handle other people's opinions, I wanted freedom from the over-protectiveness. Then there's my dad who never taught me and skills and yet calls me useless because 'all I do all day is sit at the computer'. He has no social skills whatsoever and I have never been exposed to anything social growing up. He was a terrible teacher and I hated doing anything with him because he would just get angry and make me upset. Sure he did his best and I understand everything about him knowing what his parents and experience were like.
What I'm getting at is that I ended up sensitive, caring, nice, 'feminine'. I lacked 'masculine' traits such as being able to take action, handle emotions. A healthy person whether male or female needs a balance. Anyone can be too nice that they get walked over and can't handle criticism (me), but obviously there are lots of jerks out there. Your parents don't determine how you end up because you have many other influences on your life and ultimately you decide where you end up. Still have role models that are either both balances, or a caring loving role model as well as a stronger confident role model are desirable. These don't even have to be male/female or even parents. Even if you have them you may not take influence from them. Still some people will never agree with me because they just view all this as personality traits.
My opinions aren't based on traditional values, they don't come from my parents directly, they don't come from any religion because I'm not religious, it is more based on modern 'spirituality' and 'psychology' (I’ve read a lot on this topic, and I want to be a psychologist, I’m by no means qualified and I will probably change my beliefs throughout life) and my own experience. I really wanted to make myself clear because I brought it up, although it was unfair to place it on same sex couples.
Actually, the gay and lesbian community is acutely aware that sexual polarity is independent of gender.
No one is perfect; no one is expected to be. Equality is great, I believe in it. Women and men should have the same rights. However I think feminism has confused some people. Equality is not sameness. There is always polarity and it is not dependant on genre. My arguments could be completely false is this is all based on our DNA.
Single parents can raise a child well, so can same sex couples, so can heterosexual couples. All I'm suggesting is that it's healthy to have balanced role models.
My friend has the strictest, most middle-class and "perfect" parents ever. He's gay.
The society norm of the view for what are the perfect parents is bull. It's stereotyping. You can be too strict, and there will be so much going on behind the scenes no person outside of that environment will really see the truth (hasn't homosexuality proven to be in the genes anyway). It's the same as stereotyping anyone, or when people say that I will ace a test without any effort because I'm smart even though I put a huge amount of working into preparing myself. I disagree with lots of norms in society. Work to pay bills and nothing else. Work now so you can retire later. Go through school, go to college, get a good job, but a house, look after it, have kids, wait till after the kids are grown up to enjoy your life, go in debt, work to pay off all your material goods, you life is always on hold. No, no, no. If that's what you want to do fine, but I think we should live in the moment and follow our passions. Do what we really want regardless of what people think or want from us. That's off on a tangent but it gets my point accross.
Nothing in life is ever ideal, a safe and caring environment is far more important that anything else. All of us who voice our opinions are saying what we believe, yet that is determined by our own experiences. It's like we are all wearing different colour sunglasses that we view the world with, and no one can see eye to eye, "if only they saw it in THIS colour" we say. It's ok for people to disagree sometimes, they are voicing what they thing is right, it just depends what you focus on. I think it's important to be able to hold contradicting idea in our minds, then make our own decisions. Extremely homophobic people aren’t looking at the big picture. Some of us just like to explore and look at contradicting sides of the issue, but then stick by what we believe in.
Ok that was a long rant and probably off topic for the most part, but it brings up a lot of issues I feel strongly about. I have homework I’m supposed to be doing and if I put this much effort into it I would have literally finished by now, and then some :P
