Your Theories About Love?

[Axerax]

Currently me and my girlfriend were talking today. And luckily I came up with a theory to how love works. I found it funny at first, but it makes sense. I am curious what others have pondered and theorized about how it works or why.
So here is mine...

Love is like the crane game. You see a bunch of great prizes inside there. So you put in a quarter and try your luck. Somtimes you get lucky and get something nice. After a while like all crummy toys you get from it, you toss it away or it gets boring to you so you try your luck at the crane game for a new prize. After you've put so many quarters in the machine, you eventually get good at acquiring the prizes. So you finally put in that lucky quarter and try your luck for the best prize of all, when you finally get it, even if it requires more quarters to keep trying, you become attatched to the prize and never look at the stupid machine ever again.

Let's hear yours... DISCUSS!

 

[Reives]

I am somewhat of a (perhaps pessimistic?) realist when it comes to the subject.

I believe that even if you find someone perfect for you, it is still all about dedication and devotion after the initial honey-moon chemistry period wears off - which it almost certainly will eventually, despite how wonderful it might be.

The main thing is realizing that and accepting it, so you can devote yourself to it. Chances are that eventually, one morning you will wake up and feel emptiness in where your once flamboyant emotions for your partner were. And that's where the decision that determines your maturity of love takes place. If you throw your hands up whenever those 'butterflies' disappear, then you are probably not ready to be in a serious relationship.

There are several definitions for love interpreted by different people. Some takes a high school crush for love, some takes a long-lasting marriage for love.

I think in a way, they all count. But after you are actually married for years and years, it evolves into something different - and usually not a form of the "love" that people tend to think of when they are young.


But then again, what do I know? :p

 

[Axerax]

I understand what you mean. When you sense that initial butterfly feeling fade in a relationship and still feel something for the other partner, then that is a sign for a good long relationship. I've happily been in mine for 6 months and we have no plans to separate. If we were to try, it wouldn't even be a day before we were together again. Of course we have our little squabbles, but so does every relationship, we're all human am I right?

Well after marriage, you tend to focus more on life and less on what your partner will do next or if they will leave you, because you know the bond is there and don't need to worry as much and can focus on important things.

 

[Anglachel]

You can't act devoted to something for very long without actually becoming devoted.

My definition isn't long winded nor emotional. In any any case I'm not the best person to be talking about it. However it has to be just a set of cheicals being released in your brain.

 

[Axerax]

That isn't necessarily true. People could say they are devoted to their game, then the first year rolls around and they decide to give up after it reaches a hard point realizing how much work is required... thus breaking that devotion. But I will give you this, I know what you are trying to say. You can only fake an emotion or feeling for so long before it actually becomes like second nature.

 

[CIPWM74]

I believe it's magic. Nothing else.
Don't criticize me on this, don't try and scientifically prove what love is. If I believe it's magic, then I do. I've had many a-people try and say "Aw! But there's no such thing as magic, then there's *Insert Long Chemical Name that sounds like a Greek God here* and *Like before* And they..."
When I've told them that. Don't you people try and do it to me too.

 

[Venetia]

6 months isn't long enough for the butterflies to fade away. They didn't for me for two years. I've been with my husband going on 7 years. Sure, the thrill lessened over time, but it wasn't gone for quite a time. And even still it's not totally gone, I get a little thrill from sneaking a playful grab in public, and when he does something really unexpected/special. It shouldn't ever go away completely, I think that's the key.

Another key is similarities. They say that opposites attract, but similarities bond. And what opposites you are have to be compatible. I'm terrible with money, but he's great w/ it, so I let him do the accounting. He's awful at fixing/building things and I love to fix & build, so I build and maintain all our appliances/furniture. But our core values are the same: Major likes (video games), personalities, general public opinions, religious opinions. Nothing'll be identical but I'm saying they should be similar.

You need to be more than lovers, you have to be best friends, because otherwise when the intimacy gets tired, there's gotta be something bigger to hold it together.

----

I think that love is more like a piece of furniture, like a rocking chair.

If you don't maintain it or pay attention to it, or if you abuse it, you could break it, or it'll get rusty and squeaky from disuse and you'll throw it away. But if you put a lot of work into it, and really care about it and use it all the time with care, it'll be glossy and smooth and'll become an antique instead of another heap of kindling for the fireplace.

Maybe I'm old fashioned :#.

 

[Tohsaka]

According to members on #rmxp, love is a chemical sensation that can be simulated with drugs.

I smite the one that said that.

Anyway, I have no theories about love. It's something that just happens. There's no explaination to why (sometimes, it's fake and we all know what the guy is after), but it happens. It may not always work out, but eventually it will. There will be someone that you will wish to devote yourself to regardless of who they are and what they do.

Basically, love is like the random roll of a die. When it works out, it's all great.

 

[JakeyZombie]

I'm still dealing with teenage hormones.
I'll throw my opinion in this topic when I'm not so emotionally erratic.

 

[sandgolem]

According to members on #rmxp, love is a chemical sensation that can be simulated with drugs.

That's actually quite true.

Love is overrated IMO.

 

[Jstreet]

Love = ?

 

[Reives]

Love == n^x+1

 

[Axerax]

Love is very complicated. I've never lost that loving feeling for my girlfriend... she is the first girl i've dated... and I've dated a bunch of girls in my life... but she is the first I honestly want to marry. I know I know... I am young, but I am sure about a few things.

When I get in a relationship I set 3 rules...
Don't Lie to me.
Don't Cheat on me.
Don't Ignore me.

I get very upset if any of the first and 3rd happen. And the 3rd can lead to a break up, the 2nd is an automatic breakup. I was in a 3 year relationship a long time ago... and when I called her, a guy picked up and said that she didn't want me any more and hung up... so ever since then, girls who cheat, I completely frown upon and am mildly disgusted with... Only reason you could cheat and it be alright. Is if the guy you are with treats you badly... or visa versa for guys in that position.

I lost the nervous feelings "Butterflies" after the first 3 months... The magic is still there though. I trust her with my life and would take a bullet for her. She is the same way with me, how she puts up with me is beyond me, I am very weird at times, but she loves me anyways, I can always make her laugh, know all her tickle spots, etc. She is the same way with me. Having that kind of bond where you feel like you've known eachother forever is the greatest feeling in the world when in the right context....

I miss her just writing about this stuff

 

[Reives]

To be honest, reading what you are writing in almost every post almost assures me that you still got the initial chemistry going on, heheh. Don't get me wrong though, I don't mean it in any offensive way, and there's nothing wrong with it.

 

[Anonymous]

According to members on #rmxp, love is a chemical sensation that can be simulated with drugs.

yeah this is pretty much it exactly.

 

[Venetia]

To be honest, reading what you are writing in almost every post almost assures me that you still got the initial chemistry going on, heheh. Don't get me wrong though, I don't mean it in any offensive way, and there's nothing wrong with it.

Yes, I agree. When you're with someone long enough, the severe addiction to them fades. Instead they begin to feel like just an extension of you. You can do anything around them (fart, accidentally leave the door open while taking a leak, say something taboo, etc.) and neither of you are affected by it. When they're away it's not such a bad thing, as long as you've got trust . Hell, I'm kinda relieved to have the hubby work extra hours sometimes, I finally get some alone time!

Some people never achieve this, that's what I presume goes wrong in 90% of failed marriages. The trust is never fully established and you're constantly worried about what you do. An insecurity thing, to be sure, but all new relationships are piles of nerves and insecurity.

But trust me, six months isn't enough for you to know if she's the be-all and end-all to everything. Of course it feels that way now, because you're still in the new-romance mode :'). Live with her for two years, whiff the various gasses that escape her, take care of her when she's really sick, have a few nasty arguments that mend well, and realize that you haven't gone on a date in a month because sitting around at home with her is just as good, and then you'll know if you're ready to spend the rest of your life with her. :')

Nobody ever believes me until they get there :')

 

[ArisingFlame]

Mine is... Quite different. By different I mean there is a 700 mile difference in the place I live, to her home. It blows. But, we've been together since I moved (Which was 8 months ago) and we're still going strong! It get hard at times though...
But would you call it love? I do.
Maybe I didn't give enough detail but... Yeah.

 

[Cruelty]

no offense, but that was one of the dumbest analogies i've ever read (first post)


love is just interest and physical attraction. neither one really last all too long, either. relationships that last longer than that interest are probably either really compromising, or just really dull

 

[Untra]

Ive heard before that love can give people a warm, fuzzy feeling on the inside. Six months ago I had this feeling for a friend of mine, and all that day I felt really lightheaded and happy. I was like that for the rest of the day, just smiling and sighing and imagining a happy future with her.

However she liked someone else, and so I went my own way with another friend of mine. I still wish I could have been with her, but I like the girl I'm with now.

Man, I must sound like a total fruit saying that, but I truly do feel like that sometimes. If you've ever had that kind of feeling for someone, you know what I'm talking about.

 

[G-man]

Love? Hah I'm 15 and that is definitely NOT in my vocabulary. ^_^, I cho0se to love one person, he's always right by my side, when I call he's there and everything, god I love myself.