i'm using this as an opportunity to tell you all that i'm back from re-reading the twilight saga for the past year while rocking out to the ever-talented saint miley cyrus, both of which i pray to every night before i go to bed. and i think you all should, too.
you see, i'm born-again because of three new things in my life. these wonderful things? twilight, miley cyrus, and the goddess herself, Lady Godga, as i like to call her. if each of you have just five minutes, i'd like to sit you down and talk about these glorious wonders of the world, who have all saved my life.
my life before gaga, cyrus, and twilight was so plain. i sat in my room all day, staring at the walls, talking to the walls, and eventually - yes - having an intimate relationship with my walls. it was a sad, sad time for me. until one day i went outside and i saw a girl playing lady gaga music while reading miley cyruses book and watching twilight movies at the same time!! she looked so happy! and i wanted to be happy!! so i broke up with my walls and got a friend and basked in the beautiful fragrance these three things had, the trifecta of beautiful i like to call it.
look at this beautiful creature. i lover her and she loves me. i pray to Godga every night that i will look like this angelic being. i've prayed every night for the past 7 months, and i think my teeth are finally starting to grow in a little crookeder. miracles do happen
i actively read the books of twilight, which have become my bibles. i someday hope to find myself a vampire, who looks like a cross between miley cyrus and lady gaga, and be subjective to his very whim. maybe if i do everything he says, i'll be a vampire someday! with no soul! and i'll bear his half undead child! i'm so excited at the thought of that
so reading these books prepares me for these situations should they happen soon. (and believe me, i hope they do!!! )
sigh. perfect, right?
i hope i've educated you and persuaded you to follow me in my quest for a better life. if you have any further questions, please let me know
i will be glad to help. and thank you for welcoming me back into a society where i feel like i make a lasting impression - someday i hope to build an army for Godga.glad to be back!
