Where I Am

[Ellie]

Guys,
I posted this in staff but to be honest I think the members need to know as well.

I'm going through a very bad time right now and I think it's fair that you know that.

Some of you might know that I have a medical disorder which has led to severe depression and shit. Well, that's small cakes to be honest. About two months ago my nan, who is very close to me and my family, had a funny turn. On her 86th Birthday she found out she had cancer. Two weeks later she was admitted to hospital and told she wouldn't be coming out. They let her out after my family and her demanded, and she is now at her home with us as full time carers. This is why I am not generally around until after 8pm GMT.

Well, she is in her very, very last days now. It is horrible.

Friday night my dad had a phonecall to say his brother (obv my uncle) had died suddenly in the night, from something relating to high blood pressure. This happens to be something my dad also suffers from and he is a similar age. I think it goes without saying that the shock has been immense and these few days have been very troubling.

When I get stressed and am near a pc, I code things. You probably noticed the card game, the resource manager, fuck, all the work I've put into this site - it's all because I need to do something. When I'm at my Nan's house I don't have that option and the stress is killing me.

I'm not leaving. I'm not even going to be inactive so long as you permit me the daytime off obviously.

I just felt I needed to let you know because I am probably being a bitch and a cow lately and that's not right.

Regardless, happy journeys.

 

[Daxis]

hahaha wyatt being a bitch? so far i haven't seen anything like that from you dude, like ever, realtalk.
All the coding makes me think you have a lil bit extra time, but that's perfectly cool.
hope everything works out good for you man

Regardless, happy journeys.

 

[bacon]

como you havent been a bitch :c

 

[Jason]

Lol you've been acting fine lately, haven't really seen a change.

But oh shit, I feel sorry for you, losing your uncle and knowing your nan is going to pass away soon... that's bad.

I remember when my Uncle died (Only had one uncle, had an auntie too, but she died while my mam was in labour with my big bother, she has a heart attack while driving to the hospital...), his girlfriend had just left him, and when he got depressed or stressed or anything, he'd ride around on his motorbike (It was fucking gorgeous, Kawasaki Ninja), but this time he went out without his helmet, and ended up crashing into the side of a bus, all I can remember is someone talking to my mam and saying they couldn't recognise his face, and his spine and lodged into his brain... like oshit!

Don't really know what to say, so uhh... carry on with your duties? *shrugs*

 

[Star]

Hey Wyatt, it's probably meaningless for me to say this but I figure I might as well lend my support if I can. You'll go through some tough times in your life and well you'll get through them cause for right now you still have your Nan. It might not be for long, I'm not saying go offline or anything but you need to spend time with your nan. Let her know everything you feel. I had a great grandmother that I was supposed to call every now and then and I failed to do even that. She really loved me and I loved her but she's gone now. I ended up receiving her table and chairs from her dining room with my new house. Now I can't do much but to think about her watching me all the time. We as HBgames want to be here for you and anybody here not taking this seriously is bound to understand. It's okay to be cranky, upset, mad, sad, happy. We'll all be here for you. Zeriab will give you hugs and I will too.

 

[moxie]

I've never seen you act remotely bitchy or boviney man. I'm really sorry about everything that's going on with you.

 

[Venetia]

Wyatt don't apologize for jack shit! Do whatever you need to do to get through everything. You haven't been acting weird. Everyone who matters :heart: 's you and fuck everyone else.
I've had to deal with terminal family members--if you want to talk about shit you know how to talk at me.

 

[Anski]

Take it easy, Wyatt. Don't let the world crush you cause of this.

 

[bluehazed]

Wyatt, you just hang in there, and take things easy for a while. Chill for a bit.

 

[dadevvtsvre]

i think the best thing to do is to step away from the site for a bit. be with your nan. it's all you can really do, and nobody expects more than that. hope things work out for you.

 

[moog]

Wyatt, I will take over being admin.

I know this day has been coming for years and I am ready to ban dadevster take charge

 

[moog]

nah serusly shit sucks bro and im sorry to hear it, but youre the best admin this site has had in a really long time and im proud and glad to be apart of it under your leading

ven, soph, arb, peri suck my balls

 

[mawk]

I'm really bad at these things but I gotta agree; you don't have to apologize for anything. you've been doing a fantastic job, even despite the circumstances, and I don't think anyone's gonna deny that you deserve some time off if you need it.

I'm really sorry that you have all this to deal with. we're here for you, man. I guess a bunch of slackers on the internet can't offer a whole lot but whatever you need we got your back.

 

[kyonides]

Since I lost my father I guess I know what it is to live at those crucial moments. If you feel bad, well, it's kind of OK since it's something that takes time to accept or assimilate at any rate... You might think that your nan may deserve to get some good rest after all those years of taking care of her relatives. Regarding your dad's health condition I think it might be a good chance to take care about things he left out for the last couple of years and live a little bit more peaceful or active life depending on what was his previous life style. That might mean he'd need more support or comprehension or motivation than before but I think his family should be able to help him get away from that menace. Man, it's sad to read what happened to your uncle. If you know you can learn something positive from him then do it now that you can to honor him or even your nan.

 

[Twirly]

Since I lost my grandfather a week ago while I was visiting him in kosovo I sorta understand how you feel man, still it's not the same.
My condolences to you and your family... that's all I can say.

 

[Sgt. Cookie]

What can you say to something like this? Other than, march on and know that there are people here. We can help, or we can just sit by and watch. As we can't help we can only watch.

Soldier on.
Find a path.
Walk with hope.
Understand that weare here.

 

[Toams]

wyatt you know i love you
why do i even post here
:kiss:

 

[moog]

:kiss:

f@gg3t

 

[Zeriab]

Wyatt... I dunno what to say.

*hugs*

@Lebron James:
You use it all the time in the staff forum.
Does that mean you are a closet faggot D:

 

[Maneo]

Shit. Man.

I feel you.

My uncle died in cancer at age 48 in 2001, after being in a hospital bed for two years.
That was a hard time for me.

I´m sorry for what is happening to you, and I hope it all works out for you.




You have my support in any case.

As dadevster said, be with your nan, and rest a bit from the site a while.