So, how do I stop freezing up?

[Fafnir]

Let me make this quick and to the point. Theres(cant use an apostraphe for some reason... wierd) a girl I like, and Ive liked her for a while(a long while), and now I think Ive finally build up the confidence to try and ask her out. However, theres one slight problem: I keep freezing up when Im near her, stopping me from asking her out....

Anyway to stop this whole thing? I have the words in me(boy, do I have the words), but if I keep losing "cohesion" around her, then how can I even use them?

 

[Zankoku no Yami]

You don't, you're stuck in a deadlock. And its a good thing, because words mean nothing and you'll be rejected because all women suck (on a romance level).

*cough*

Now might be a good time to point out that this opinion is from someone who is very, very bitter on the whole romance thing despite my young age. But I'm currently pissed off about things like this (simular situation that ended horribly =D) and couldnt help but give my bitter opinion... and am probably going to be shot.

 

[Nin]

Don't freeze up. Grow some balls, talk to her, tell her how you feel.

It's hard I know, there's a girl I want to ask but she likes some other guy, and she said we were just friends after she figured out that I liked her cause I flirted all the time. :/

But yeah, just ask. Take a breath, say fuck it, then start talking. The rest is butter.

 

[holloway]

Get stoned like a rat.

 

[alexia]

Before you ask her out, I'd suggest just talking to her first. Start a conversation. Are you in the same class? You could break the ice by bringing up a tough assignment or say something about the teacher, etc. If you're not in the same class, perhaps you could talk about a school function that is coming up. My point is, before you ask her out, you should try to get more comfortable around her by just talking to her without the pressure of possibly getting rejected. It sounds as though you are admiring her from afar. The chances of her rejecting you will be higher if she doesn't know you on a more personal level. She might think, Okay, this guy has never talked to me before but he wants to go on a date? Another advantage of talking to her is to see how she reacts to you. Does she seem genuinely interested in what you have to say or does it seem as though she wants to get out of the conversation? And if it's the latter, asking her out would not be a good idea and it would probably be best to move on.

 

[Anonymous]

Get stoned like a rat.

this. nothing says "i love you" like a glassed-over stare~

 

[Ellie]

Talk to her. Get to know her first. By then you'll either:

1. Know her, so have the confidence to ask her
2. Realise she's just not your type or whatever and move on

 

[sixtyandaquarter]

For some reason verbally bumbling over one's sentences and figuratively stepping on one's tongue in an attempt to woo is considered cute since the 80's - and unlike most annoying trends, this one hasn't gone the way of the mullet or the acid wash jeans - ... I just made myself remember mullets and acid washed jeans... erech... I feel dirty...

So, anyway, just admit you're nervous and throw in a cute little hesitation and you're already 35% more cute than you were before. It's like a fairly amusing sale at a car rental. Cutting rejection rates so low, you should be sent to the asylum - It's arm flailing tongue sticking out foaming at the mouth in a cheap polyester suit crazy!

 

[Anonymous]

i dunno man, i know lots of girls who are like HEH YOU TRYIN TO ASK ME OUT????WELL COME BACK WHEN YOU GROW SOME BALLS so the AWW HES STUTTERIN THATS CUTE angle might not really work too well. it might though.

also comparing asking a girl out to renting a car makes you even higher in my list of cool members (you were already pretty high up so that's pretty good!!)

 

[holloway]

Yeah, I'd say bike rental tbh.

 

[Prexus]

Grab her and kiss her. Either she'll scream and cause a huge fuss, reject you (which will happen if you ask her at this point, since you already showed her you aren't confident), or she'll be so impressed by your confidence that not only will you be going out with her, you're now the dominating presence in the relationship so you can do whatever you want.

 

[candle]

Do you realized that that's sexual harrasment, right? That is a big no-no.

Look, dude, all I can say is grow some balls, make small talk for a while to gauge her reaction to you, and when you feel she is comfortable enough with you, ask her out. What's the worst she can do? Say "no?" If she does, just move on. Where as if you follow Prexus' advice, you could get into big trouble at school, or even arrested if the girl decides to make a fuss. She might not make a big fuss, but are you willing to risk it?

Either way, don't let her walk away without trying, or you'll never get another chance. And once you do get her, don't let her go or it might be the biggest mistake of your life. (of course, these last two sentences depend on how much you like her. You might get her on a date and find out that she is the most obnoxious, stuck-up little brat in the world, but you'll never know unless you try)

 

[Nin]

Grab her and kiss her.

Or rape whichever floats your boat.

 

[Andy6000]

Honestly you people don't even know what he's referencing. Shame on you nin. It's much worse for you.

(btw taking prexus seriously is gr9)

 

[Roman Candle]

Work out something to say before you see her, and try to remember what it is. Don't follow her around, but just try to kind of 'ease' yourself into her company. Oh, while you're at it, try to remember to try to work out if she's interested in you in any way whatsoever.

Alternatively, get really drunk. Nothing says I love you like throwing up on their shoes. Alternatively, get her really drunk, (no, not for the reason you're thinking), because nothing, and I mean nothing, says I love you like calling an ambulance.

 

[holloway]

Follow her around for a day or so, perhaps watch her through the slits in your locker.


THEN she'll know you're interested.

 

[Buster]

Follow her around for a day or so, perhaps watch her through the slits in your locker.


THEN she'll know you're interested.

For some reason, that one's only worked once for me... and that chick was seriously messed up in the head. *twitch*

It'll probably be easier for you to get more confidence if you ask her in an environment where there are a lot of people, but very few (if any) are paying any attention to your existence (or hers, actually); a lunchroom, maybe.

Also, when you do talk to her, don't be uber-serious guy. Try to be at least semi-casual in telling her. Smile the entire time (Not a huge, OMG I AM SO FRICKIN' HAPPY smile, but more of a mild, content smile) and before you delve into asking her out, just have some small talk, and be sure to make her laugh a few times (Don't try it on purpose, 'cause it's never funny on purpose). Most girls want a guy to maker her laugh above anything else.

 

[madmax_vii]

Best idea would be that if you can't say it to her, subtly write her a letter about how you feel, the only reason why you lock up is because you're afraid of failing, instead think about if you really do want her, and if you do that much you can ask her no problem, just ask her to some place quiet (not in a "Imma rape j00" kind of way!) and open up to her, if you begin to freeze just tell her you find it hard to say, because to tell the truth the thing you're most afraid of is if she rejects you, just remember that you've nothing to lose, so if she says no now there's always a chance to recover and try again.


To summarise all of that, just open up to her, and when I say open up I mean let everything out, then if she rejects you you know you've tried and that's the most you can do.