So, it seems every other thread here is about your first time having sex, or your first time getting head, or your first time doing a donkey and a midget at the same time while a one-armed nam vet masturbates while humming the super mario theme. Instead of making another thread in the same vein (i.e. "high schoolers lie about the first time they got laid") I'm doing a manlier thread that hopefully will feel less dishonest and more realistic.
I got into a lot of fights as a kid, and I didn't win most of them. That's cause I have anger issues (Ixis with anger issues? It can't be!). Here's a couple that stand out in my mind.
The first time I got into a fight with someone who wasn't my brother was during 2nd grade or somesuch. I had brought nunchacku to school because I was into TMNT and thought Michelangelo was the shit. They weren't heavy duty or anything, but they were sturdy and covered in a spongy rubber material. Anyway, this one kid who never brushed his teeth or took a bath but I considered my friend started hanging out with this girl I liked (or convinced myself I liked as I wasn't into girls at the time. Basically she was cool and popular.) Needless to say she didn't like me, but she liked my friend and told me she would marry him because she knew it would piss me off. Then during recess I took my nunchaku and tried to beat up this kid, but they were made of rubber ass so it did all of diddly-shit. Then I got detention and they took away my nunchaku, never to be seen again. Ever since that day until 6th grade I would tell the principal he owed me my "legendary implements of ninja destruction", of course he had no idea what I was talking about.
Anyway, next fight: (don't know how it started) was in about 8th grade. I was fighting with one of my friends at the time, when this other kid who kinda wanted to get into our group came up on rollerskates and asked what was going on. Friend A asked for help because he was a scared little shit, so rollerskate kid gets some momentum and clotheslines me while I'm distracted with kid A. I get up and start trying to push kid A to his feet when rollerskate kid comes back around. I duck underneath his second clothesline and felt really cool and badass, until kid A came up behind him and got me right in the face. I got my ass kicked, but their team up attack was pretty sweet.
Then another time, this kid in a motorized wheelchair that everyone hated because he acted like a royal douche pulled the metal foot rest off of his wheelchair and tried to kick me and my friends' asses... So we just walked six feet away at a normal pace and continued our conversation. He left us alone until the next day he came back to try and kick our asses... But we were hanging out in this tree out back... Seriously though, that kid would spit in my fucking Koala Yummies. I used to wonder why he was so angry all the time. I know now, but, yeah. Memories.
Oh, another time I got beat up by this girl because I said her Lion King drawings looked like shit. And one time I snuck into my roomate's room, got on his laptop and replaced his wallpaper with yaoi, and then he came out and tried to wrestle me to the ground, but I tickled him and got away until he took my Guitar Hero guitar and broke it over my head. Then he paid for another one when Guitar Hero 2 came out. I'm not gay. Then one time in 7th grade this kid tried to throw a pinecone at me and my friends when we weren't looking, and I turned around to catch it just in time and threw it back, and when it hit his face I went "Limit Break MOTHER FUCKER!"
And I've been a nerd ever since.
I got into a lot of fights as a kid, and I didn't win most of them. That's cause I have anger issues (Ixis with anger issues? It can't be!). Here's a couple that stand out in my mind.
The first time I got into a fight with someone who wasn't my brother was during 2nd grade or somesuch. I had brought nunchacku to school because I was into TMNT and thought Michelangelo was the shit. They weren't heavy duty or anything, but they were sturdy and covered in a spongy rubber material. Anyway, this one kid who never brushed his teeth or took a bath but I considered my friend started hanging out with this girl I liked (or convinced myself I liked as I wasn't into girls at the time. Basically she was cool and popular.) Needless to say she didn't like me, but she liked my friend and told me she would marry him because she knew it would piss me off. Then during recess I took my nunchaku and tried to beat up this kid, but they were made of rubber ass so it did all of diddly-shit. Then I got detention and they took away my nunchaku, never to be seen again. Ever since that day until 6th grade I would tell the principal he owed me my "legendary implements of ninja destruction", of course he had no idea what I was talking about.
Anyway, next fight: (don't know how it started) was in about 8th grade. I was fighting with one of my friends at the time, when this other kid who kinda wanted to get into our group came up on rollerskates and asked what was going on. Friend A asked for help because he was a scared little shit, so rollerskate kid gets some momentum and clotheslines me while I'm distracted with kid A. I get up and start trying to push kid A to his feet when rollerskate kid comes back around. I duck underneath his second clothesline and felt really cool and badass, until kid A came up behind him and got me right in the face. I got my ass kicked, but their team up attack was pretty sweet.
Then another time, this kid in a motorized wheelchair that everyone hated because he acted like a royal douche pulled the metal foot rest off of his wheelchair and tried to kick me and my friends' asses... So we just walked six feet away at a normal pace and continued our conversation. He left us alone until the next day he came back to try and kick our asses... But we were hanging out in this tree out back... Seriously though, that kid would spit in my fucking Koala Yummies. I used to wonder why he was so angry all the time. I know now, but, yeah. Memories.
Oh, another time I got beat up by this girl because I said her Lion King drawings looked like shit. And one time I snuck into my roomate's room, got on his laptop and replaced his wallpaper with yaoi, and then he came out and tried to wrestle me to the ground, but I tickled him and got away until he took my Guitar Hero guitar and broke it over my head. Then he paid for another one when Guitar Hero 2 came out. I'm not gay. Then one time in 7th grade this kid tried to throw a pinecone at me and my friends when we weren't looking, and I turned around to catch it just in time and threw it back, and when it hit his face I went "Limit Break MOTHER FUCKER!"
And I've been a nerd ever since.
