Not a very good review. You only looked at the first 10mins of the game. A lot of the stuff you analysed seemed insignificant and changing them wouldn't make a difference at all. Like making guards move around or adding fish to the stream on that small map you'll probably only pass through twice in the entire game. The direction you exit the castle does match the outside, I think you got confused looking back because there are windows on the inside where there shouldn't be. The only good point you made was how it was hard to tell who was speaking. Since you didn't talk to any of the npc before hand you couldn't connect the names with the sprites. But I don't see it as a flaw, maybe a conflict of playstyle. NPC are important sources of information in rpgs. If you don't know whats going on or who's who, it's because you ignored it.
If you're spotlighting RM games I think you should point out what they've done differently or done well compared to other RM games of the same engine. A lot of rm2k games use the mac and blue chipset but not every game has a CMS. Be informative, you mentioned the game was a fan game but you didn't say of what or that the game is currently an unfinished demo and the only playable character is Zach.
Edit: Also if you're video reviewing indie games maybe you should ask for this thread to be moved to Game design and Development Discussion since it's board related.