Read this. Read it all.
First thing I see is the massive 127 mb size. Sure, it's not that big compared to the memory most computers have. But it's huge for an RM game. Why is the filesize so big? I can't comprehend how sound effects would make a game so bulky. People aren't going to be enticed into downloading your game for the sound effects, so you might want to consider carefully going through and removing all the extra sound effects, leaving only the ones that are absolutely necessary.
The whole "percentage completion" thing is pointless. How can you tell when your story is 70% completed, or when your database is 35% done? How do
we know how much progress you've made when we have nothing to compare it to as a reference? All I see is a bunch of arbitrary percentages that mean very little. Something that's ten times more meaningful is a "to-do" list. Give us a list of what needs to be done in a game. It doesn't have to be long - just enough so we at least know what more has to be done.
....Somewhere, in a plain between worlds... four dark mysterious figures gather...
Figure1: "The time has come... *laughs*... He He wishes to begin immediately... So lets, shall we?"
Figure2: "As long as he shows up on the death bed of Mother once more for a final show down... I'm willing to start... Humph... I wonder if he'll be surprised to see me living once more...
Figure3: "And you say you can grant unimaginable power correct!? Yesss~~~ as long as I get that power... I'm willing to serve *licks lips*.
Figure4: "...And you're worried about some Shinigami?"
Figure1: "*snickers*... No I'm worried about a Gami Shin Ookami...."
Where to begin. It's like you've taken every single RPG cliche and rolled it up into one big ol' ball of trash. I'm going to ignore the fact that the intro tells me absolutely nothing about the game and assume it's presence in this thread actually has a point.
As barriers between worlds are being torn down, join up with an alliance of good to combat evil. On your way to forming an army from the alliance gain aide from Souls (Summons[KoS], Aeons[Final Fantasy], Summon Jutsu[Naruto]) you take by showing your worthiness. Do you have what it takes to defeat this organization of Dark Dictators from controlling all life?
How is taking characters from three
completely different games and forcefully shoving them together in one game a good idea? Listen, it's alright if you fantasize about them in a piece of fanfiction or something. But what could these characters
possibly have in common with each other, except for the fact that you like them?
Like bacon said, the plot is extremely simplistic. There's your typical evil bad guys who take on some of the most uninspired forms I've seen. (dark mysterious figures? use your imagination!) And then there's the stereotypical good guys who fight the bad guys. I'll get more into the characters later.
The game is about worlds that are colliding into other worlds. These worlds are the worlds of:
Kingdom of Souls
Final Fantasy (1-10)
Bleach
Naruto
One Piece
D.Gray-Man
Toonami (Tom is a playable ally)
Even More
Oh man. Again, these games have NOTHING to do with each other. Forcing the player to play in worlds from games that have zero connection is going to feel awkward and bizarre. It just shouldn't exist outside of the imagination, y'know?
*Zane Setzune* & ZenUrufu Scarlet
Weapon: ZenUrufu
Element: Darkness
Main Attributes: Strength, Speed
-Works Best with: Xunxen
OverDrive: Gami Shin Zen Ookami (God of Death, Zen Ookami)
Zane: is the holder of Setzune, the Wolf that bares the master Gami Shin ZenOokami and is ruler of soul energy and brute strength. Zane has one of the 12 great bloodline traits, Setzunegami, Eyes of Death which is the Primal Trait, claimed to be either of little use or great danger depending who wields it.
Urufu(wolf): Zane's Kontan Tsurugi(Soul Sword), although a female, she's quite protective of her wielder even when not in weapon form. She was born in a noble family of a Setzune followers(a group apart from the bloodline trait but were protected in the early days by the Clan) and was a prophet as she was gifted with a pink setzunegami, said to be a gift of Amateratsu's dafter.
Oh, cool, miscellaneous Japanese sounding words that sound kind of cool. Here's some advice: They don't. It's practically an insult to the language, and everyone is sick and tired of seeing Japanese used in games.
Your characters as a whole are really flat and uninteresting. None of them seem to have any redeeming qualities or faults. Really good characters have an element of humanity that we as the players can empathize with - I'm not seeing that in your characters. Try and give them three "pros" and three "cons", as a start, to round them out a bit and make them more interesting. And make sure to give them each individual goals - something that they want to accomplish in the game, and by accomplishing it, makes them a better person in some regard.
I really don't know what else to say about this thread. It truly epitomizes everything that's wrong with RPG Maker games. bacon gave you some really good comments about your maps - you should definitely read them.
Listen. I am
legitimately trying to help you. Whether you think it's insulting or not doesn't matter, because it's all valid criticism. I'm going to give you my honest opinion. If you truly want to make a good game, a game that others will enjoy playing: start over. Scrap your story, scrap the plot, scrap the characters. Start from scratch. But really consider your game. You have to have a premise that people other than yourself are going to enjoy. A premise people are going to have fun playing. If you want to write a fanfiction, go for it. But don't have it as a game. You have to do some hardcore reflection on the premise of your game. You don't have to make anything really professional, but it has to be something that people will enjoy playing.
