I can't say I didn't notice you drawing back, nor can I say I didn't see this coming, at least in part. More to the point, I chose to ignore the signs, attempting to chalk them up to an overactive imagination and a rather hyperactive sense or paranoia. I can't even say that I didn't have at least a small part in this, even if you did come around to seeing my side of things.
Anyhow, I'm sorry to see you go. You've been a constant fixture in this site for my entire stay here, and it will feel, well, empty without you. You've always been here, and you were always someone I could count on to have a good laugh and say something interesting. It's too bad that the same sense of fun has gone away for you, and I really do think that, if that's the case, you really should move on to brighter pastures where the grass is greener, the sights are fresh, and nothing makes you think back on what things were, instead of what they could be. Who knows? Maybe one day you can come back and regain that sense of fun, and maybe spice up the life of the site.
As I said, this site will be different without you. Maybe not worse, but definitely not better. I hope you can find somewhere else fun, and that your situation in life improves enough that you actually have time to enjoy that new place. Maybe some time in the future I'll stumble on some other forum, look at a username that looks familiar, and suddenly realize who it is.
In any case, best wishes, take care, and live your life as you want to, not as you have to.