Home Brew Meals

[bacon]

Home Brew Meals

 


Not all of us go to a restaurant daily and we have to rely on ourselves of a family member or a friend to cook us a wonderful meal. Home-cooked meals give off a homey feeling that is irreplacable. Don't you remember that smell of grandma's pie, or the taste of mom's meatloaf. Regarding home-cooked meals:

Some ideas

• What is the best/worst home-cooked thing you have had?
• What is the best/worst home-cooked meal you have cooked?
• What is the most exotic food you have cooked?
• Do you have any fond memories of your family cooking?
• Does your family have any secret recipes?
• What kind of food do you/family cook?
• Do you have any odd/funny stories involving a home-made meal?

This thread foils with the resturaunt thread. If you have any other question/stories to add, please feel free to do so as my list isnt the greatest. Post some pictures as well. It could be something you have cooked or baked. o: I seem to be fixated on food this week. :3

 

[moog]

you make good topics

 

[Glitchfinder]

To be completely fair, the worst meal I ever cooked was probably inedible to the point of being lethally poisonous. And it wasn't even something that is supposed to be hard. I once put a noodle cup in the microwave without filling it with water. (I forgot to do it...) By the time I realized what I had done, the microwave was spewing a foul-smelling yellow smoke, and when opened, revelaed a smoldering briquette where the foam cup filled with pasta had been. We doused it and opened all the windows and doors, and let the breeze blow away the smoke. It took over an hour for the smoke to clear, and the house smelled wonky for months. The microwave still has a yellow-tinged inside, too...

 

[Tindy]

Worst thing I've made so far was popcorn (!!)..... I've never made stovetop but I really wanted popcorn so I just tossed some kernels and oil in the pot and hoped for the best.... They actually burned the bottom of the pot and kind of disintegrated. O_o

 

[Venetia]

once i made a pot of mashed potatoes while rather loopy on pain killers. it would've turned out ok, except i kept forgetting if i'd added salt or not. i would do something and then add some salt, then do something and then wonder if i added salt and add more. by the end it was basically a salt-lick in liquid form :X

a whole pot of potatoes, had to toss em ;o;

i also made quite a few things while on ambien, mostly consisting of random condiments and pantry-findings, which i would "o.O" at the next morning when finding the leftovers. but everything tastes good on ambien and i wouldn't eat the shit sober so idk how good/bad it was :x
once i found what looked like instant biscuits, half-cooked, covered in ketchup, honey, and tuna from a can, mixed into a bowl, half-eaten. :X

 

[High Hopes]

Once I tried to make microwave fudge, but I was drunk due to a lack of sleep. So, I put the mix in the microwave, following what I thought were the instructions. It took awhile longer than it should have, but before too long there was something that looked like fudge in the bowl. It was strangely liquid-y and bubbly, though. Didn't look at all like fudge. I didn't care, though. I was all like, "Fuck yeah, fudge!". So, I took my spoon and dug right in.

I found out at that moment that it wasn't really fudge. It was caramelized fudge powder. I think you can divine what happened afterward.

 

[Zackwell]

All the nasty things I've made...

My brother wanted some Rice Krispies, But we had no milk...
So I gave them to him with Ketchup instead of milk.
He loved them :x

Tried to make a dumpling, had no clue. I made something with the consistency of a brick and the adhesiveness of a glue, if you didn't hold it with greaseproof paper. It was fun for a while, throwing little hard sticky yellow cubes at people, and them wondering what the fuck was going on.

Tried to make some chocolate brownies, suceeded, but we couldn't get the icing right. In the end, we gave my brother the 99% sugar mix, and he ate it all. We woke up to find the walls plastered with it.

For halloween, I made grey, strawberry flavored buns, with purple, orange flavored icing. Unfortunately my brother put a whole bottle of orange essence in the icing, so it tasted like being smashed in the mouth with an orange-flail.
I had to resist the urge to give them to trick-or-treaters, and say "You know when you've been tangoed!"


Lord.

 

[Venetia]

oh god speaking of cereal, fruity pebbles and beer (instead of milk) don't mix well :X


rice krispies and ketchup?? god little kids will eat and like anything.

 

[dadevvtsvre]

When I was eight years old and I was alone in the house once, I tried to melt some chocolate chips on the stove. So I put a bunch of chocolate chips in a big plastic bowl, put it on an element, and cranked up the stove a couple hundred degrees. When I came back ten minutes later, the bowl and its contents had completely melted. Runny plastic was dripping from the stove and smoke was EVERYWHERE. The fire alarm went off and the kitchen smelt awful for the next three hours. The worst part was when my parents got home and saw melted plastic all over the kitchen. :x

Looking back on it, I'm really lucky that there wasn't a fire.

But it was kinda cool when it hardened because the plastic had melted into a bunch of nifty forms :D

Tried to make a dumpling, had no clue. I made something with the consistency of a brick and the adhesiveness of a glue, if you didn't hold it with greaseproof paper. It was fun for a while, throwing little hard sticky yellow cubes at people, and them wondering what the fuck was going on.

Also tried this. More or less the same result.

 

[High Hopes]

I just made a big pot of Dirty Rice(Spices, Rice, and Beef) for dinner, with fuckton of spices. Very cool meal, bro.

 

[Tindy]

When I was eight years old and I was alone in the house once, I tried to melt some chocolate chips on the stove...

This whole story is why I wasn't allowed to use the stove alone until I was 12. :X

 

[Velocir_X]

The worst thing I ever made....
well I wanted to see what soap in the microwave looks like, and then after it burned, I just went on and cooked me a baked potato, tasted like melted plastic :X

Best thing,
I cooked me-self some steak (3 minutes in the oven on the right shelf for medium rare - we have a great oven), a baked potato, bell peppers, and some green beans.
For a diner made in <5min it was pretty good tasting...

 

[rey meustrus]

To be completely fair, the worst meal I ever cooked was probably inedible to the point of being lethally poisonous. And it wasn't even something that is supposed to be hard. I once put a noodle cup in the microwave without filling it with water. (I forgot to do it...) By the time I realized what I had done, the microwave was spewing a foul-smelling yellow smoke, and when opened, revelaed a smoldering briquette where the foam cup filled with pasta had been. We doused it and opened all the windows and doors, and let the breeze blow away the smoke. It took over an hour for the smoke to clear, and the house smelled wonky for months. The microwave still has a yellow-tinged inside, too...

I did this too once, only I was 7 years old (I think) and it's not that I forgot, I found it in the cupboard and it said on the front in BIG BOLD LETTERS: MICROWAVE 2 MINUTES. So I did. Oh, but it smelled nasty.

Also, don't try and use oatmeal for anything but oatmeal. I once had the bright idea to make something with an oatmeal base for dinner (I think I added eggs, some kind of vegetable, and cheese). It probably would have at least been edible if I didn't put sugar in it (don't know what I was thinking there; sometimes I feel like I have dissociative disorder when I'm cooking, and too many cooks spoil the broth...). But hey, I didn't want to go to the store, and there wasn't much on hand.

As for good things, never underestimate the awesomeness of rice. If you've got steamed rice, top it with cumin and fry something over it (meat with dry spices, or vegetables in sauce). Instant deliciousness. I decided to make a sauce with some "chili paste with garlic" and soy sauce. It worked well. Taste came in waves there (first there's an earthy taste from the vegetables, then a "bam" of the chili, and then salty).

 

[sojournen]

What kind of food do you/family cook

I FUCKING LOVE TO COOK. That aside. One of my particularily favorite dishes is a soup.

Chicken broth base, italian sausage, cabbage, carrots, onion, zuccinni, peppers, and whatever else suits my fancy. Let that simmer on low heat for a few hours, then throw in some perogies and serve with a tablespoon of sour cream in the soup. It's OMFG delicious.

Just tonight I made homemade pizza, homemade butter followed by scratch buttermilk biscuits, and two loaves of multigrain bread.

Sick.

 

[Cait]

Sigh! If you guys want a good laugh, I wanted brownies... didn't have chocolate, so I decided to make "blondies" and well... I am sorry to say that they ended up tasting like "cornbread"... uch: Or the time I made tuna salad, and added can of vegetables.. you know the ones with carrots, pea, and potatoes, I added those, and let's say that was the last time I did that. It tasted really bad, or well, boring and tasteless.