Dryads

[bacon]

So I was reading your thread. Your story is a little bit iffy in the thread, I would clean it up and maybe add some fillers. It sort of skips around. The whole tree thing in my opinion doesn't make much sense. Im sure you have an idea, you just are not expressing it into a comprehensible section. With that said, I think you have a decent start. You have some nice background story and ideas. However, I can see this story turning into a typical JRPG somewhat quickly. Just remember to be original with your story and dont mess it up. You have a somewhat original base, keep it that way. Originality is the best thing.

Coe doesnt stand out as a dynamic character in my opinion, he is sort of there. Like, he doesnt have a distinct personality. On the other hand, Korina does and she seems like the typical character who is bent on revenge but then towards the end realizes it is futile and learns from her old ways. You need to add a flare of originality and life, break away from the cliche molds. Character development is more important then basic story.

Your mapping needs some work as well. I suggest posting in the mapping improvement thread and getting some tips. You misuse some tiles and your overall mapping is clunky. You need to pinpoint on finer points of details and make your maps pretty.

Your facesets, while it has already been mentioned, could fit with the character sprite more. Or why not just change Coe to a girl, I see no problem with that as well. Its always nice to see a main female protagonist.

Your battle system has some neat features. I like the fact that there is only one weapon, and by customizing it you gain power. Its a simple method. I also like how you dont have giant HP numbers, again the simpler the better imo. I dont understand some of your fine points such as attacking with a tree, it would be better if you elaborated more.

Overall, you have a decent start and some good ideas in your bag. However, this could teeter into typical RPG game. Be original and creative with character and story and develop a meaningful bond between character and player.

 

[zchin]

Thanks bacon for the rather lengthy and helpful critique.
ok, well mostly all the games i've made before, always had a female protagonist, I just wanted to try a male one, and I guess I do better with girl characters, I'll try and make Coe more interesting, but he wouldn't stay for the series if I ever made a second one, but I guess that's no excuse to have a 2d character, there never is...

I will post some stuff in the mapping improvement thread. i will also try and explain the "tree thing" in the thread. I don't think that there would be a love interest if Coe was a girl so my brother said that they could both be lesbian, it's original but in a way, would it be a turn down in any way? Because most Americans are a bit mean to those kind of people. >.<

Thank you and have a nice day!

 

[zchin]

Sorry to all of those people who have at least little interest into my games, but I'm going to stop making them until I am ready. If your that much into my games, I will be competing in the competition dungeon making contests. And if I do, however magically finish a game in my private computer taking my time with no interest of finishing it, then I will post it in the completed games section...

That is all, thank you and have a nice day!

 

[LaDestitute]

Shame. Shame. Your going to give up that easily? Don't be a coward, just finish it. Are you really going to do this when you have "Check out my new game designed to finish" in your signature. It's like punching yourself in the face! See me? I just keep going. I lose my project A:DEM...didn't hurt, so I started on TCT. And I'll finish TCT.

Your game is a above-decent and good concept to begin with, and could use some improvement in areas (such as mapping) but this looks like a promising game if you continue working on it and polishing it.

 

[silver wind]

This looks promising, take a break if you wish but don't throw it all away. Why don't you just release what you have so far?

 

[Star]

Oh my gosh! No friggen way are you gonna quit on this. Just do it! You spent so much time preparing it already what's the point in giving up on it. You've actually made me wanna continue working on my old game instead of doing a different kind of one.

 

[zchin]

Fine, I will start it again if you people want me to. But this is going to have very slow development. I shall put this game into a non-ABS state because that would require a lot more work and more time on my behalf to quit the game again, like I always seem to do. I will remake the dungeons into simple small ones with a few puzzles to pass through, and it will be releases twice, once with the game finished, second with the extra character Aelia. I will have to find a script that will be basic enough, probably the tankentai or a sideview battle system, although i am not sure how I will get the animated battlers... If anyone wants to help me with them just send me a PM.

 

[Star]

Fine, I will start it again if you people want me to. But this is going to have very slow development. I shall put this game into a non-ABS state because that would require a lot more work and more time on my behalf to quit the game again, like I always seem to do. I will remake the dungeons into simple small ones with a few puzzles to pass through, and it will be releases twice, once with the game finished, second with the extra character Aelia. I will have to find a script that will be basic enough, probably the tankentai or a sideview battle system, although i am not sure how I will get the animated battlers... If anyone wants to help me with them just send me a PM.

There. That's better. Animated Battlers? I thought you didn't need battlers when you picked the sideview battlesystems. At least the one Strawberry was using didn't need it. That's the whole downside to using ABS's like XAS, it takes so much time for making battlers. But with enough spriting knowledge you can do it. I've been working on a XAS game for like forever and haven't made much progress. You should post more help topics and requests and if people don't respond to them, bump it up and you should eventually get a response as long as you ask it right.

 

[zchin]

Ok, but I'm not intending on using the XAS anymore, I am, looking for a sideview battle system, and I'm looking for anything I can frankensprite to make the battlers for the characters.

Thank you and have a nice day.

 

[LegSicon]

wooow i was actually inspired by this game, i like the screenshots, its pretty much simple and nice use of RTP, this is how my game is gonna look, definatly, abit different ofcourse, but your game is so cool.

I don't know why but this is one of the few RTP games that sticks out from the bunch

 

[zchin]

Thanks, I'm glad this game has done about two things that proved helpful for people, I found some battlers I'm gonna mix and stuff, I'm also adding a pet system, and I got all the enemies already, and I'm going to change Coe a bit, I'm gonna make him be drafted into the army at 13 and have him escape and stuff soo...

Thank you and have a nice day! (yes! i got to the 2nd page :smile: )

 

[zchin]

I worked on the first frame for the Coe battler, it's the idle pose, tell me what you think, it's not really Franken sprited that much though only the palettes and the hat, then I re-did the shading, I'll post this for critique in another place, but for either storyline or pixel critique both are welcomed here.

viewtopic.php?p=749698#p749698

Thank you and have a nice day!

 

[Star]

Well it looks like you've gotten a lot better at Spriting, you might not even need my help anymore. Good job, keep up the good work.

 

[zchin]

Oh geez, I've gotten that much better? Thanks a ton for that sentence, it actually made me feel pretty good about myself, by the way, I haven't been spriting much... :smile:
And I'll still need your help, because two is better then one, production wise.
I've went ahead and made a 2nd frame too it. I got some advice from bacon in the Wips and small things thread so i changed some stuff in the first frame and carried it too the 2nd too.

Thank you and have a great day!

 

[luv_kitty12]

This is looking very good if you ask me. It will be really a shame if you just give it up so easily. Even if you are going to work so slowly, it's better than throwing it all together.

Of course, that's not everything I have to say. I'd like to give a little criticism.

~ This isn't very important, but it adds a little steadiness to games. Your spelling and grammar are good, but they need a bit of improving. The thing that attracted me the most is your misplacing of the comma and the period. I think if you fixed that, your story as well as your in-game paragraphs will be more understandable and easier to read.

~ As for your mapping, it's very nice overall. I just have a point to give on the first map. First, I have to say that I like the shadows thing very much. It gives a very nice, real feeling! But for the map itself, it's a little bare. I know that these what deserts are, but I think it's a bit overdone. Add a little cactus, maybe, with some vegetation. Differentiate with the mountains and hills, too.

There is just one thing bothering me in the two maps. In both screens, Coe is talking to Lisa. However, the sprite of Lisa in the first one is different from the second one. Am I right or did I get it confused? O_O

There, my two cents! Hopefully, they can be a little help to you and I wish you all luck with this. :grin:

Note: That little sprite of Coe in the upper post is absolutely cute!

 

[zchin]

Thanks for the comments, I think I might go through my word document for the thread and fix the run on sentences, although it's just a habit of mine while typing, it's pretty killer, if you notice I'm doing it right now...

Ok now too make the rest of my post run-on sentence free. I'm probably going to have to put in this Lisa girl in the thread, because I didn't notice she would become the main protagonist... Anyways, I'll explain why there are different costumes in the screenshots as well just wait for the update. I've re-done the maps and conversations at the starting of the game and their are a lot better then before. I also changes some things up and I'm now, hyped about making this game. The Coe battler is going to be chibi as well as Korina's those are my main problems here, but I should get through them at this pace.

However I'm still needing a proper logo for this game so I shall request it in the resource request and just hope it will get answered.
Thanks for the comments again Luv, and welcome to the forums too.

Thank you and have a nice day!

 

[zchin]

Ok, I'm putting up a poll to see which title screen i should use, and you can post any suggestions for me to add to the poll. The poll will be active, tomorrow or in two days. So here are the title screens i can't decide over...

Animated Title Screen Sofia V 1.1
http://www.atelier-rgss.com/RGSS/Menu/XP_Menu10.html
(your going to have to translate the page via google translate, it's in Portuguese)
I like the whole thing, the layout is a bit cliche

Spoiler

NXP_MS Title System
http://www.creationasylum.net/forum/ind ... opic=24143
(I posted on that thread years ago, when I was new to the RM communities)

Spoiler

I like the layout for this, and I will definitely change the graphics for this.

I'm sure there are a lot more title screens that I would love, so if you see any you like that looks like it could be voted for, post it up here, any one is welcomed.

 

[luv_kitty12]

Thanks for the welcome! I am getting comfortable around here already. :wink:

Personally, I think the first layout "Memories of Trees" suit the theme of your game more. The second one suits a mechanic game more or maybe a racing one, but I don't see it really fits your game. But that's just my opinion! :smile:

 

[zchin]

Oh well, the 2nd one, I'm going to change the graphics for it, so it should be more fitting to the theme like the 1st one, I'm glad your feeling welcomed around here.

Do you have any suggestions or any title screen scripts in mind, or are these two enough... I think I'm going to go with the 2nd one in the voting thing.

Edit: The 2nd one's download link is corrupted...

Thank you and have a nice day!

 

[zchin]

Ok, I'm not going to be doing the poll, because i found an evented title screen and I did it, and it turned out like this:

The art things are of the seeds from the tree spirit in the game, they are playable characters, which you can highly customize. Right now, there are only two class routes so...

Thank you and have a nice day!