bashful crobat
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What have been the ten most excruciatingly tedious things for you in the last decade? Anyone, anything, anywhere. Go.
Me first, in no particular order:
Jade Goody
I hate this bint. For those lucky enough to not know her, she's the two-faced, Shetty-bashing, pig-faced cancer-bag product of Big Brother UK 2002. She was famous for being loud, crude, and being about as smart as a dirt clod. When her initial fifteen minutes faded, she starred in various reality tv brainfarts in an attempt to cast herself once again into the public eye, and then again returning to the house for Celebrity Big Brother UK 2007. While there, she made a flippant, mildly racist remark at Shilpa Shetty (supposed Bollywood starlet) and was booed and hissed at etc. She used that as her way into Bigg Boss, the Indian version of Big Brother. She then made a gargantuan fuss over her having cancer and dying or something.
Robert Pattinson
He's not attractive. He can't act. He's as dumb as a post (so much so that his face can only do one 'look'). Yet, stupid womenfolk flock to him as if he were some sexual guru who grants orgasm with a broody stare in one's direction. What a twat.
Peaches Geldoff
She's famous because she's a haughty, arrogant cunt with a famous father.
Chavs
Shopping List:
Cheapest Gold from Argos[]
Burberry Knockoff[]
Bad Hat[]
Croydon Facelift[] (chavettes only)
Badly "pimped" Car (read:loud and ugly)[]
Brand Name Clothes[]
White Trainers[]
ASBO[]
Mark Ronson
Lily Allen? More Trumpets. Daniel Merriweather? More Trumpets. Amy Winehouse? Strumpet, with more Trumpets.
Fred Goodwin
He thought it a good idea to screw over the Royal Bank of Scotland in the midst of a financial crisis in order to net himself an alleged £342,500/annum pension. Well done you!
Jamie Oliver
He's a lisping, pig-wanking faggot who will stop at nothing to tell the nation what they can and cannot (note: not should and should not) eat.
Jordan and Peter Andre
She's an ex-page three fakebreasted mother of a handful of spastics. He's a tonedeaf aussie pop 'star' with too much fake tan and a small chest. Put them together and you get some relaity tv "powercouple" who you can never escape; newspapers, magazines, tv, internet, radio. They were everywhere. A few months back, I was getting so sick of hearing about their endless disputes and spats and partners and opinions and ugh.
Scenesters
You're a bunch of faggots. Even the girls.
Social Networking
Nobody cares about what you had for lunch or how you felt after watching the news. Nobody cares what you have to say about anything in regard to anything at all stop posting your shitty opinions to the wind.
We started drinking so I ran out of steam.
Oh My God I've Got To Put This On Twitter!
Me first, in no particular order:
Jade Goody
I hate this bint. For those lucky enough to not know her, she's the two-faced, Shetty-bashing, pig-faced cancer-bag product of Big Brother UK 2002. She was famous for being loud, crude, and being about as smart as a dirt clod. When her initial fifteen minutes faded, she starred in various reality tv brainfarts in an attempt to cast herself once again into the public eye, and then again returning to the house for Celebrity Big Brother UK 2007. While there, she made a flippant, mildly racist remark at Shilpa Shetty (supposed Bollywood starlet) and was booed and hissed at etc. She used that as her way into Bigg Boss, the Indian version of Big Brother. She then made a gargantuan fuss over her having cancer and dying or something.
Robert Pattinson
He's not attractive. He can't act. He's as dumb as a post (so much so that his face can only do one 'look'). Yet, stupid womenfolk flock to him as if he were some sexual guru who grants orgasm with a broody stare in one's direction. What a twat.
Peaches Geldoff
She's famous because she's a haughty, arrogant cunt with a famous father.
Chavs
Shopping List:
Cheapest Gold from Argos[]
Burberry Knockoff[]
Bad Hat[]
Croydon Facelift[] (chavettes only)
Badly "pimped" Car (read:loud and ugly)[]
Brand Name Clothes[]
White Trainers[]
ASBO[]
Mark Ronson
Lily Allen? More Trumpets. Daniel Merriweather? More Trumpets. Amy Winehouse? Strumpet, with more Trumpets.
Fred Goodwin
He thought it a good idea to screw over the Royal Bank of Scotland in the midst of a financial crisis in order to net himself an alleged £342,500/annum pension. Well done you!
Jamie Oliver
He's a lisping, pig-wanking faggot who will stop at nothing to tell the nation what they can and cannot (note: not should and should not) eat.
Jordan and Peter Andre
She's an ex-page three fakebreasted mother of a handful of spastics. He's a tonedeaf aussie pop 'star' with too much fake tan and a small chest. Put them together and you get some relaity tv "powercouple" who you can never escape; newspapers, magazines, tv, internet, radio. They were everywhere. A few months back, I was getting so sick of hearing about their endless disputes and spats and partners and opinions and ugh.
Scenesters
You're a bunch of faggots. Even the girls.
Social Networking
Nobody cares about what you had for lunch or how you felt after watching the news. Nobody cares what you have to say about anything in regard to anything at all stop posting your shitty opinions to the wind.
We started drinking so I ran out of steam.
Oh My God I've Got To Put This On Twitter!
