The Storyteller
Member
This is a novel I have been working on for awhile, and wanted some feedback on its summaries of the chapters so far. I hope this is the correct place to post it.
I have much more done than this, 34 out of 50 chapters actually, this is a snippet of what is to come in the ongoing Boehemer(Bow-he-mur) Series
The novel itself has been put on hold for awhile and I have gone back to short stories.
The man off for a work is John Foy
His wife is June Foy
He found the planet Fortuna
His wife is June Foy
He found the planet Fortuna
Chapter 1
 Do to certain unknown reasons this has been deleted
Chapter 2
 Off for a month *
 Back to work *
 Gets caught up *
 Fire upstairs
 Computer acts up
 Readings on Fortuna are correct but thought wrong
 John realizes readings are correct
 Studies more on this
 Dream from Chapter 1 starts
Chapter 3
 June is captured
 June is interrogated
 John is being interrogated
 June is finished being interrogated
 John is finished being interrogated
 John is murdered
 June disappears
 The press release for Fortuna is released
 Tyro is informed about John’s death
 John is found in his office
 The search for June begins
 June is found
Chapter 4
 Research on Fortuna continues
 The ‘telescope in space’ captures a better picture of Fortuna
 Research on Fortuna continues
 Tyro is informed of ‘secret discoveries’
 A new press release comes on
 Cuts to John’s kid in New York
 He is getting on a plane
 He is captured by masked people
 He is brought to Florida to his mother
 His mom and him are killed (brutally like his father was)
 Cuts to Tyro
 Tyro is informed about the two more deaths
 A press release comes on
Chapter 5
 Research continues on Fortuna
 The ‘TV Telescope in space’ captures live footage of Fortuna
 A press release on the TV shows this footage
 An explosion of a planet is seen on the live television
 Tyro comes on to speak about this explosion
 The President comes on for a program saying he is cancelling the war, and grants permission for a manned mission to Fortuna.
 Cuts to Florida
 The masked ‘men’ get ready to head north for the ‘Presidents speech’
 Cut to President
 The President finishes up and gets off stage and heads to his office
 Tyro and the President speak of the recent murders, plans for Fortuna in the future, and recent Fortuna news
 Cut to Heading North
 The masked ‘men’ are on a plane speaking in an unknown language of assassination of the President, and their recent murders of the Foy family.
 They arrive at the President’s office
 Guns ready they aim for the office
 Cut to President’s Office
 President dismisses Tyro
 Tyro walks outside the door and closes it
 The President takes a few deep breaths and reads over his reports
 President is killed with a shot to the head
 Tyro calls Secret Service
 Cut to Masked ‘Men’
 They get into a van and get away not seen
 Do to certain unknown reasons this has been deleted
Chapter 2
 Off for a month *
 Back to work *
 Gets caught up *
 Fire upstairs
 Computer acts up
 Readings on Fortuna are correct but thought wrong
 John realizes readings are correct
 Studies more on this
 Dream from Chapter 1 starts
Chapter 3
 June is captured
 June is interrogated
 John is being interrogated
 June is finished being interrogated
 John is finished being interrogated
 John is murdered
 June disappears
 The press release for Fortuna is released
 Tyro is informed about John’s death
 John is found in his office
 The search for June begins
 June is found
Chapter 4
 Research on Fortuna continues
 The ‘telescope in space’ captures a better picture of Fortuna
 Research on Fortuna continues
 Tyro is informed of ‘secret discoveries’
 A new press release comes on
 Cuts to John’s kid in New York
 He is getting on a plane
 He is captured by masked people
 He is brought to Florida to his mother
 His mom and him are killed (brutally like his father was)
 Cuts to Tyro
 Tyro is informed about the two more deaths
 A press release comes on
Chapter 5
 Research continues on Fortuna
 The ‘TV Telescope in space’ captures live footage of Fortuna
 A press release on the TV shows this footage
 An explosion of a planet is seen on the live television
 Tyro comes on to speak about this explosion
 The President comes on for a program saying he is cancelling the war, and grants permission for a manned mission to Fortuna.
 Cuts to Florida
 The masked ‘men’ get ready to head north for the ‘Presidents speech’
 Cut to President
 The President finishes up and gets off stage and heads to his office
 Tyro and the President speak of the recent murders, plans for Fortuna in the future, and recent Fortuna news
 Cut to Heading North
 The masked ‘men’ are on a plane speaking in an unknown language of assassination of the President, and their recent murders of the Foy family.
 They arrive at the President’s office
 Guns ready they aim for the office
 Cut to President’s Office
 President dismisses Tyro
 Tyro walks outside the door and closes it
 The President takes a few deep breaths and reads over his reports
 President is killed with a shot to the head
 Tyro calls Secret Service
 Cut to Masked ‘Men’
 They get into a van and get away not seen
I have much more done than this, 34 out of 50 chapters actually, this is a snippet of what is to come in the ongoing Boehemer(Bow-he-mur) Series
The novel itself has been put on hold for awhile and I have gone back to short stories.