Quick writing

[action]

No, I have no idea where this is going. Just a "write as I go" thing

Spoiler

This is a story about a man with two hands, two feet, 10 digits, 10 toes. He lived in a house, he died in his sleep. He had a life, he had a job. There was nothing immediately unusual about him. A simple, normal life.
If that was what he wanted, then you could say he led a happy, successful life.
But that was never what he wanted.

Now what I just told you is what everyone knew about him. He really did have all his limbs, a full set of fingers and toes, and everything else you would imagine to be the "usual."
But of course, this story would be nothing without something "unusual"
Which is what he was.

In what way? Did he have some supernatural ability? Was he actually the king of the world? Did he have blue skin?
No; frankly, none of these are true.
He was on the outside, of course a normal man. If he wasn't, everyone would know, and I wouldn't have told you that everyone thought he was normal, would I?
How silly of you to think such things... blue skin, ha!
No. This man was simply a genius. Nothing more, nothing less.
A genius with no way to show what he was.

The man was born September 9th. If he was much of a believer in the superstitious, he would have known what his life would be like.
If you are much of a believer in the superstitious, I recommend you go study up what's so special about September 9th.

No? Of course you wouldn't have the patience to study such a thing. But no matter; I will tell you.

He was born on September 9th. Thanks to astrology, he would be looking for something to complete him for the rest of his life.
Isn't that just horrible. To know that all your life you would be incomplete - in soul, that is.
Of course, because he was never one to believe in the superstitious. In fact he never even thought about the future. It was mostly what's happening now. If not that, then what he just did.
He thought he should worry about things once he gets there. Nothing wrong in that.

In fact, it may have even been his first work of genius.
What? Does a man have to create a life changing machine, solve the mysteries of the universe, or divide by zero to be a genius?
No. Although he was constantly coming up with ideas in his head, he never did any of that.
But even so, the man was a genius.

Now, tell me. Right now, would you have known that in seven years, 24 days, and 1 hour you would have to decide whether to eat a chicken sandwich or just wait until everyone got home and cook some potato soup. No? Why not? Because you can't predict the future!
What's that? You could have thought of that? No, you wouldn't have actually thought that if I hadn't told you. Because nobody thinks of anything without anyone else's guidance; his second work of genius.

Of course, I have to leave off on a cliff hanger before I tell you about his third work of genius.

 

[Daxis]

well i found that fairly interesting.
However, there was a bit of pacing issues. I mean, when I started reading, it felt rhythmic for a moment, then it abruptly changed into a normal tone of speech, occasionally touching back to something resembling a rythm.\

At first it seemed like you had an idea of what ot do.... but then it sorta became one gigantic babble. I actually think it was entertaining, but later on you could feel a bit of, this isn't going anywhere.

Strangely enough, it looks like it could be some sort of verse or poem or whatever- there's a structure of repetition every here and there.

 

[action]

hey daxisheart

could you tell me exactly where it started to get boring. I have a new idea for the plot, and I want to know which part I should keep

 

[Daxis]

somewhere at/after the third paragraph. you state him a genius, someone unusual, and then state nothing but random and mundane facts about him, saying he's a genius except he hasn't showned it and etc. It's like, "hey this dude is awesome," then suddenly you get defensive, "what, why is he awesome?" and then continue to state and enforce the idea he's even more mundane.
The reader already knew it was quick writing, so it was a half expectation for some babble, which it felt it later turned into. However, I wouldn't say that it was exactly boring, though/

 

[action]

but babbles no good?

 

[Daxis]

the babble's pretty fine, there's something that it's working towards to, but it's a bit too disjointed and meaningless, since there's that feeling that you're just going along with it. since there wasn't any actual resolution for his geniusness or whatever, it feels a bit too much like babble and a random tangent of thought that you're reading.

 

[action]

Oh I was trying to make it seem like the narrator was talking to the audience, and write sort of like the Hitchiker's Guide to the Universe