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Once a Week - Ending Sunday

This week's theme is Military Science Fiction.  I'm not sure how many people are still interested in this, but I'll at least submit my story. :tongue:

James laid in his bunk, hovering somewhere between consciousness and dreams.  He tried so hard to get to sleep, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get rid of his thoughts.  The rumors he had heard about the Magus were keeping him from slumber.  Their enemy wasn't normal.  But, that wasn't entirely true.  They were humans, but they were...different.  The Magus battled with better technology and the almost invisible mechanisms they used made their abilities look like magic.  James shifted uneasily, trying to find a comfortable position on the hard bunk.  He rolled onto his side, trying not to make too much noise.  It probably didn't matter since most of his fellow soldiers were awake like he was, but there were some who were able to sleep through the fear.  After a while, even the stories couldn't push back sleep, and he felt himself slip into dreams.

They were prepared for battle early the next morning.  The official notice given by the Magus said that the attack would come soon after sunrise.  James watched the horizon turn red, trying to feel what type of weather they would have to battle in.  The soldiers around him, in perfect formation, looked drowsy from being wakened so early.  James probably looked the same, but his appearance was the last thing on his mind.  Whispers reverberated through the group, being hushed occasionally by the commander.  A crisp breeze hit them, sifting through each soldier, scanning them before being carried away.  It grew eerily silent, as if all of nature was being hushed.  The wind died, the clouds cleared, and the birds that had been brave enough to investigate their group flew off in a panic.  Every soldier in the military knew what that meant, and the whispers faded quickly.

The sun blazed over the horizon as if it knew its importance on this day.  Most of the soldiers sheltered their eyes from the light, trying desperately to keep the hill in view.  Suddenly, James heard screams from the back of the formation, accompanied by the sound of grenades exploding.  It was enough to destroy any kind of order the commander had managed to maintain.  James could hear guns loading and saw the soldiers around him turning toward the back, but he knew better, as did his commander.

“Everyone in the back three rows, turn around!  Everyone else, keep your eyes in front of us!â€
 
:eek: Oh, I thought it was one week after you started the thread. Well, I'm not too informed on this genre anyway so I guess I'll just look out for the next one.

Okay, I read your story and it was very well written. The second paragraph especially, with the intense descriptions and the personification with the wind was a great way to draw the reader into the story. It also left me with a slight feeling of paranoia due to the fact that this could be applied to those U.F.O. witnesses and the mainstream society's tendency to dismiss it. The first paragraph was littered with commas that disrupted the flow of the story though, but that didn't get in the way much. This will probably be the highlight story of this thread (especially since there probably won't be any more people entering between now and 12 am.)
 

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