Last Christmas
- Thread starter Ellie
- Start date
Well, this Christmas is pretty whacky. :/
I remember one Christmas eve when I came home from church and was falling asleep over my plate of chicken cordon bleu~
Another when I wanted to sleep on the loveseat in the basement (that thing was damned comfy)
There's a tape somewhere in the bowels of my apartment of a church service when I was about six, with my voice on it.... "When the time comes, who do you follow? Do you follow Jesus? Or will you follow the devil?" "JESUS!"
There's also a long-running thing in my family where my dad will get us one (or more) present(s) that we really wanted, one thing that's *close* to what we wanted, and one thing that just makes absolutely no sense (or it takes more than 3 minutes to draw the connection). Case in point: The year I got a DS...I got a sushi making kit. With no ingredients. O_o
I remember one Christmas eve when I came home from church and was falling asleep over my plate of chicken cordon bleu~
Another when I wanted to sleep on the loveseat in the basement (that thing was damned comfy)
There's a tape somewhere in the bowels of my apartment of a church service when I was about six, with my voice on it.... "When the time comes, who do you follow? Do you follow Jesus? Or will you follow the devil?" "JESUS!"
There's also a long-running thing in my family where my dad will get us one (or more) present(s) that we really wanted, one thing that's *close* to what we wanted, and one thing that just makes absolutely no sense (or it takes more than 3 minutes to draw the connection). Case in point: The year I got a DS...I got a sushi making kit. With no ingredients. O_o
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I remember one time (don't think it was on Christmas, but might have been) when I was playing Zelda: Ocarina of Time (just got it new, was in the dodongo cave) and my grandparents showed up in the house, randomly. They live halfway across the country. I had no idea they were coming, so it felt like a dream.
Most of my xmasses were pretty tame and not too exciting. Except one year, which was enough excitement for my whole life p much.
One Christmas back in the 90's, we had waited until the evening to open presents so we could do it with my aunt and cousins after dinner. My mom was trying to open a can of that gelatin cranberry sauce and she sliced the palm of her hand wide open. It bled all over the kitchen because instead of cradling it/applying pressure like a sane person, she flailed around for a minute. And when I say "all over" I mean ALL OVER. It was on the cabinets and floor and the food that'd been left out (we tossed it after, yes) and the fridge and everything. Luckily the cran sauce was kind of a dessert and we'd already eaten dinner.
So dad drives her to the ER. That left me (age 10 or 11) home with my aunt and my two little cousins (ages 4 & 5).
I'm cleaning up the gorefest in the kitchen, and then one of my cousins decides to throw a temper tantrum over not being able to open gifts until my mom got back from the ER, and he stumbled into the tree. The tree knocks over and the star at the top bursts, and it's electric, so the circuits are tripped and the lights go out.
I frantically find a candle and reset the circuit breakers. Then I wandered into the living room and suddenly smelled something burning. I thought it was probably the smell of my lighting the candle and ignore it. My aunt takes the little kids into my room for a time-out. They're screaming at the tops of their lungs and crying like there's no tomorrow, probably both from fear and frustration.
Then, the fire alarm starts going off. I run back to the living room and apparently the tree is on fire. It's a fake tree, so the lovely aroma of burning plastic fills the room. I grab a fire extinguisher to put it out (after my aunt tries to throw water on it and I yell at her over it to stop her--it's an electrical fire--yes she's not too bright).
But I had never used a fire extinguisher before, and in case you've never used one, they are VERY VERY PRESSURIZED. When you pull that lever the fucking thing EXPLODES foamy powdery shit. I'd used SHOTGUNS before that had less kick-back than this thing. It bucked up and popped me in the throat and knocked me on my ass. Incidentally it put out the fire, but it also made a comma-like arc of foam/powder/whatever-that-shit-is across the living room and couch.
The rest of the night we were airing out the living room by opening all the doors and windows. It was pretty cold out so we all just kind of huddled for warmth in my parent's bedroom and watched Batman on VHS until they got back. When they did they tripped balls about the mess and sent my aunt/cousins home.
We cleaned up everything until I passed out on the couch. The next morning I opened my presents >_>
Luckily though it was a pretty good haul that year :P
One Christmas back in the 90's, we had waited until the evening to open presents so we could do it with my aunt and cousins after dinner. My mom was trying to open a can of that gelatin cranberry sauce and she sliced the palm of her hand wide open. It bled all over the kitchen because instead of cradling it/applying pressure like a sane person, she flailed around for a minute. And when I say "all over" I mean ALL OVER. It was on the cabinets and floor and the food that'd been left out (we tossed it after, yes) and the fridge and everything. Luckily the cran sauce was kind of a dessert and we'd already eaten dinner.
So dad drives her to the ER. That left me (age 10 or 11) home with my aunt and my two little cousins (ages 4 & 5).
I'm cleaning up the gorefest in the kitchen, and then one of my cousins decides to throw a temper tantrum over not being able to open gifts until my mom got back from the ER, and he stumbled into the tree. The tree knocks over and the star at the top bursts, and it's electric, so the circuits are tripped and the lights go out.
I frantically find a candle and reset the circuit breakers. Then I wandered into the living room and suddenly smelled something burning. I thought it was probably the smell of my lighting the candle and ignore it. My aunt takes the little kids into my room for a time-out. They're screaming at the tops of their lungs and crying like there's no tomorrow, probably both from fear and frustration.
Then, the fire alarm starts going off. I run back to the living room and apparently the tree is on fire. It's a fake tree, so the lovely aroma of burning plastic fills the room. I grab a fire extinguisher to put it out (after my aunt tries to throw water on it and I yell at her over it to stop her--it's an electrical fire--yes she's not too bright).
But I had never used a fire extinguisher before, and in case you've never used one, they are VERY VERY PRESSURIZED. When you pull that lever the fucking thing EXPLODES foamy powdery shit. I'd used SHOTGUNS before that had less kick-back than this thing. It bucked up and popped me in the throat and knocked me on my ass. Incidentally it put out the fire, but it also made a comma-like arc of foam/powder/whatever-that-shit-is across the living room and couch.
The rest of the night we were airing out the living room by opening all the doors and windows. It was pretty cold out so we all just kind of huddled for warmth in my parent's bedroom and watched Batman on VHS until they got back. When they did they tripped balls about the mess and sent my aunt/cousins home.
We cleaned up everything until I passed out on the couch. The next morning I opened my presents >_>
Luckily though it was a pretty good haul that year :P
not my fam. we'd usually eat it like jell-o with whipped cream on top.
hell sometimes we'd freeze the cranberry sauce into popsicle molds and eat it like that on a stick. it's actually pretty damn good if you like cranberries. (i love them)
using cool whip, crushed ice, and not-very-ripe strawberries or kiwi fruit you can make some really great parfaits and smoothies with it too
the shit is like 40 cents a can yearround so it's a great dessert for poor people
hell sometimes we'd freeze the cranberry sauce into popsicle molds and eat it like that on a stick. it's actually pretty damn good if you like cranberries. (i love them)
using cool whip, crushed ice, and not-very-ripe strawberries or kiwi fruit you can make some really great parfaits and smoothies with it too
the shit is like 40 cents a can yearround so it's a great dessert for poor people